Campaign Story

My husband, Brian, and I got married at the end of October and it was the absolute best day of our lives so far. We have been together almost 6 years and have had our share of struggles but the biggest one has been something I never thought would be an issue. I don’t think anyone struggling with infertility thought growing up as a little girl, who wanted to be a Mom, there was anything to worry about. We all just get shown that it is what everyone has, it is normal, and should be easy so why would it be any different for me?

I have ALWAYS wanted to be a Mom since I was a little girl. I started babysitting at a very young age because I always loved kids. My Mom was an amazing role model, I come from a family of 5 siblings + large families on both sides, and because my Mom is so great with kids I guess it just kind of rubbed off on me. I was the go-to babysitter around the neighborhood for families we knew, I became a nanny for one of those families and did that for many years up until my early college years.

I became an aunt for the first time at 18. Auntie has and always will be one of my proudest titles. We now have 3 nieces, 2 nephews, and a goddaughter and I love being “Auntie & Unc” with my husband. If you can’t tell by the pictures, we’re a little obsessed.

I tried to do everything “right”, in the “right order”, go to school, start my career, make something of myself in that regard, find my person, get married, then start a family but life had different plans. Due to a close family member who had struggled with infertility around my age, I started feeling a need to get testing done to give myself some peace of mind. So, I got a couple tests done and at 28 I was diagnosed infertile before we even started trying due to a condition called Premature Ovarian Failure. This condition essentially makes your female insides WAY older than they actually are which means you have A LOT less time than most women to conceive a child, if you even can, and due to the lack of information on the condition, nobody can give us an exact age of when I will run out of time but unfortunately my body is showing signs that it will be in my mid-30s due to the rapid decline we have already seen in test results over the last couple years.

Receiving this news was devastating. I was and am still heartbroken. I wanted so hard to prove the doctors and scientific facts wrong. So, my partner and I decided that we would start our fertility journey right away because time was of the essence (even though we had imagined we’d always take this step after we got married). At that time, I already knew that Brian was the man I wanted to be with but in that moment of making that decision together, he just amazed me. He didn’t hesitate, he stood up for me, us, and our future family like no other man has ever done. He was and continues to be my rock.

Unfortunately, a year passed with no success, but life brought us a different blessing, an engagement. The last year we tried focusing our energy on planning our wedding, rejoicing in the fact that we were getting and got married, and enjoying our honeymoon while also trying. It definitely helped to have something so concrete and wonderful to look forward to in our second year. The wedding was like a dream, and our family and friends were all extremely generous showering us with love as they knew it was to help with the start of our fertility treatment expenses and while we are SO grateful for all of it, unfortunately, fertility treatments are not cheap. They are not covered by our insurance (and yes, I have tried changing this where I can) and while we plan to try the less expensive treatment options first, we’re very pressed for time. We unfortunately do not get to be one of the couples that takes some time off and then comes back for treatments later (due to my condition). Of course there are a lot of different fertility and family options out there but we’re trying to focus on one step at a time to hopefully achieve what most people get to have without all the medical intervention.

It has been 2 years and 3 months now that we have been trying with no success. Throughout the last ~2 years we have both been focusing on our health, working out, eating better, taking so many supplements the XL pill organizers won’t fit them all, etc. Unfortunately, it just isn’t working. We decided that after the wedding and honeymoon we would start this leg of our journey and it is FINALLY here. The moment I have been patiently waiting for, the sonogram to confirm I can start medication! (Never thought I would say those words in my life…ever. But I know there are going to be readers out there who get this more than others).

For those who are not as educated on infertility, I have a couple facts for you, just to open your eyes a little (I hope).
-About 1 in 5 (19%) are unable to get pregnant after one year of trying (infertility)
-About 1 in 4 (26%) women in this group have difficulty getting pregnant or carrying a pregnancy to term (impaired fecundity)
-The average cost of IVF in the US is ~$12,000-$20,000 per try
-The average cost of adoption in the US is ~$20,000-$45,000

While I may not share all our updates as we go through this process, I wanted to share our story now while I am feeling strong and hopeful. I have already had some very low points along the way in this journey and of course it’s possible I could have more, depending on how this all goes.

I will be a Mom one day, this I know. Brian and I will be parents one day. So, whatever you can do, we appreciate it more than you’ll ever know.

Praying for our miracle,

Caitlin & Brian